I AM
I am many things
A mother and a grandmother
A wife and a friend
I am loved and respected
I am cherished and i am proud
I was many things
I am now at peace
I am with my husband now
And we are watching over you
I am and always will be with you
Right there in your hearts
For as long as you'll remember me
We'll never be apart
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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Be easy on her...
Although it's not a masterpiece of a poem, it's really touching and I can relate to it as my great-grandmother just went through the same thing.
I feel for you.
It's more of an inspirational, touching poem rather than an enticing, charismatically sad musing.
It may not win poetry slam, or a poetry contest, but it does win an award in your heart.
But...
Never be afraid to speak the truth; during grieving is the best time to write because you can share your true thoughts and feelings; speak your mind; let your emotions and feelings run wild on paper.
You don't necessarily have to connect your poetry to other people, but rather to yourself.
Just so that your readers can catch a glimpse of your true feelings.
If you wish to write something, then write it!
It doesn't matter if you're criticized for your writing or not; what matters most is what you think about how well you did.
If you can do better, than tell yourself that and try your best; exceed your goals.
Agree with Ayra. This is essentially a list of cliches strung together with no punctuation....great for a Hallmark card or chain-email poem, not so great for more serious stuff. But if this really invokes so much emotion in you (or your speaker), why not give some of that unique emotion to your readers? We want to know the story behind this poem, not the sappy stuff. Tell the story, and tell it from an original point of view.
-Colleen
arch angel --
This is your, what, fourth submission today? Please, no more than one per day or else you shall suffer the wrath of the mods. Heck, I shouldn't even be bothering you about this, seeing as I'm just an ordinary member.
This poem, I think, is written for you and your grandmother. I feel faint stirrings of emotion as I read this, but I think with a subject like this, you can do much better. Oh, and capitalize your I's, please. ^_~
(My mom just screamed at me to abandon the computer, so-)
Cheers,
Camille
It's a very touching piece, arch angel. The only thing I'd suggest is:
It might flow better if you replace am with was. Just my opinion, though.
Wow this is great. Very touching. I like this poem because this shows great potential and hardwork for thought. Good luck with your writing. keep on with your wriiting.
Gothgirl01